Tuesday, 29 December 2015

Resolution Revolution!

Many of us sit down at the beginning of the year and draw up a list of New Year's Resolutions.  These are personal resolutions and more often than not we fail at keeping them.  Interestingly enough the most common excuse for our new year's resolutions failing is that we didn't have the time.  We were too busy with work and responsibilities.  Let's face it we spend most of our waking hours at work so it is no wonder that it seems to get in the way of us being successful at our personal resolutions. 

What if we changed the way we look at our resolutions and found ways to incorporate these into our work day?  Imagine that you are no longer trying to find time but that the time you are engaged in work activities is actually supporting your resolutions.  Here are some of the most popular resolutions and a few innovative ways to keep them.

Reduce Stress:  One of the major causes for stress in the workplace are the relationships we have with management and our colleagues.  Be willing to listen to another point of view and actively engage in communication, don't just listen to reply.  If you are unfortunate and you work for a company that has poor management and you are unclear of what is expected from you, call a meeting with HR or with the appropriate person within your company and get it resolved.  Nothing creates more stress than continuously feeling like you don't know what you are doing or supposed to be doing.  Being open to new ideas and change reduces stress. Be Teachable! Don't take things personally check your ego at the door.

Time Management:  Why do we fail at time management?  Because everything we know about it is geared towards managing "clock time" and what we should really be managing is "real time".  Real time happens in our heads we create it and anything we create can be managed.  The first thing we have to know is how effective are we at using our time.  Jot down every thought, conversation, task or action you take for one week.  At the end of that week look for the places where you are wasting time on unproductive things that don't produce results .  Now you have the information to Organize, Prioritize and Schedule.  Make sure that 50% of your scheduled time is spent on activities that generate results and schedule time for interruptions.  Block out distractions, not every e-mail needs to be responded to immediately.  Remember that it is impossible to get everything done in a day and be okay with that, tomorrow is another day and that is why you are prioritizing.  The good news is that 20% of your actions will generate 80% of your results so if you are concentrating on the things that matter, you are way ahead of the game!

Pay Off Debt: In today's economy more people are trying to reduce their debt load as there seems to be uncertainty everywhere.  Improving your position at work could lead to an increase or a promotion which in turn can help with getting rid of your debt sooner.  How do you improve your position?  Engage actively in meetings and show your enthusiasm for your work.  Make sure you know what the company goals are and work towards those.  Avoid negative individuals and be open to new ideas and change.  Better still bring your own ideas to the table.  Make yourself indispensable.  Most of all enjoy what you are doing, it shows in your efforts and rubs off on others.

Learn something new: This could tie in nicely with the point above.  If you are thinking of learning a new language, how about learning a language that can help you in the business world.  Chinese is a good option but if your company has a German or Japanese holding company consider that language.  Perhaps one day when there are visiting officers from head office you can be an interpreter.  Take a course that can improve your skill set or join an association that supports your career.  Don't want to do anything work related, that's okay too.  Any personal development will allow you to bring a new perspective to the workplace.

Balance Home And Work: With more of us working from home we often don't know where to draw the line.  The biggest problem of our time is the Glorification of Busy!  Somewhere along the line we have become convinced that if we can't say "Oh I am sooo busy!" we are not pulling our weight and we give the impression that we are not committed to our jobs.  Turn that around, work smarter not harder.  Don't over-commit learn to say No!  Turn off the computer, get plenty of rest and play with your children, spend time with your spouse.  Do something that makes you happy.   Meditate, do cross-word puzzles or quietly sit in thought for a some time every day.  It is proven that time spent in silence strengthens your ability to problem solve.  Once you let go of the idea that busy is better and allow yourself to be present in the moment, whether at work or home, balance will find you!

Good luck with your resolutions and remember to be present... stop worrying or projecting - things hardly ever look they way you expect them to.  Plan and take action!

Love & Light







Monday, 7 December 2015

Loss and grief...

This month I attended the funeral of a young man aged twenty four.  He died in an industrial accident at work.  Even though I did not know him well I know his younger brother very well as he is my youngest son’s best friend.  It was one of the saddest funerals I have ever been to.  It seemed to me that all the young people in our town were touched by this man and his loss in our community is heartfelt and runs deep. He touched many hearts in his short life.

It hit me hard when I saw his Mother whom I also know well.  She had fallen apart and could hardly speak.  Her grief was tangible.  She cried against my shoulder and all I could do was hold her.  I knew my words would sound hollow so I just held her and allowed her grief to flow through me.

I have been to many a young person’s funeral - my own brother in-law died at around the same age and many friends were lost when I was young.  Even though I remember being there for my sister I don’t recall being so affected by the pain I felt coming in waves off this Mother.  I have never felt another’s grief so acutely. 

I am a Mother to two young men and like this Mother I did everything in my power to keep them safe growing up.  In fact she and I are the only two Mother’s I am aware of that had strict rules in place about where they went, how late they were out and needing to know where they were at all times.  I think that is why she allowed her youngest to hang out at my house.  It seems so ironic that we raised them with such care only to have this terrible accident happen.  But I guess that’s life… and that is why we need to live every day to the fullest. 

I believe the reason I felt the grief so deeply is because I know that anything can happen at any time; there but for the grace of Spirit go I.  We have children for various reasons but mostly because it is in our very DNA to continue our blood line.  Our children are the manifestation of our belief that life is sacred, our insurance policy that we shall live forever through our seven generations. 

Here is what I know.  Looking at that Mother I don’t think all our neat boxes about grief will hold water.  There are no stages of grief for her, the so called… denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance… I saw her go through all of those simultaneously.  I know there is no time period for grief and everyone heals at their own pace.  I ask myself; how do you heal from the loss of a child, the loss of the life you carried in your womb and brought into this world with a primal roar. 

What have I learnt?  That death can be a teacher and that no matter what I should count my blessings.  Life is precious and sacred and it needs to be protected at all costs.  I need to ensure that I build a strong bond with my children so there will never be any regrets or unspoken truth between us.  I must open my heart to all around me; a simple smile will heal deep wounds.  Hold space for others and allow them to feel and experience what they need to in order to heal by just being there… no platitudes can make up for compassion felt deeply in silence. 

Lastly… live life with my whole being and make death my friend because it is a beginning not an end….


Love & Light

Sunday, 1 November 2015

Integrity

Integrity… for me there is hardly a more powerful word in the English language.  It holds so much power and hope; however it seems sadly lacking in this world.  I have been watching how the world conducts itself, from world leaders, business moguls, celebrities to the average citizen and I have to confess I don’t like what I see most of the time. 

Keeping in mind that we are all human and make mistakes it does seem that there are many that act out every impulse without any thought of the consequences.  I feel they do what they want and as long as they don’t get caught.  It is when they get caught that they really sicken me.  When did apologizing make everything okay?  They stand there looking dejected, some even with tears in their eyes as they plead with us to forgive them.  Why I ask myself did they do it in the first place?  Sure we all make bad judgement calls from time to time… but come on, you can at least own it and take responsibility for it.

There are so many examples in the public world but I see it in my daily life around me, normal people who lie, cheat and manipulate to get what they want, when they want it.  They say money is the root of all evil, that isn't true – people are, when their actions to enrich themselves are at the expense of others.

How do you know if you are acting without integrity?  I have searched for the tell-tale signs in my own life.  I have found them very helpful in testing my own integrity as well as others.

  1.  It is all about you – your needs come first no matter what! 
  2. Your self-esteem is dependent on what others think of you – you say and do anything to remain liked and keep up a front.  You do whatever is needed to stay “in”.
  3. You keep secrets – hiding the truth or outright lying to keep up your fa├žade.
  4. Your word is not your bond – you break promises.
  5. You give in – not standing strong for your principles.
I personally struggle with the last one.  Sometimes I will give in in order to avoid a confrontation.  Every time I don’t speak my truth I am breaking my integrity.  I tell myself that I am picking my battles, but am I really?  Might it just be easier to go with the flow?  I guess I am going to have to sit with that for a while…

Love & Light


Sunday, 4 October 2015

I am here...

As some of you might know I mangled my big toe about six weeks ago.  I opened a door right over it so badly that it required eight stitches.  I won’t share the actual event… too gruesome but I do want to share what I learnt from it.  It is completely healed now although it looks funny.

After the first week of dealing with the pain and general discomfort I sat down and asked myself how and why it happened.   How was I responsible for this accident?  I was astounded by what I found.

The first thing that came to mind is that I move at break neck speed!  On that day speed was completely unnecessary.  I had just had a wonderful lunch with my girlfriend there was no need to rush, after all I was only going home so why did I rip the door open with such force? 

Lesson 1:  Slow down!  I am not on fire!

The second thing I learnt was that I am not present.  I am always thinking of the next thing, task that needs to be done. I move from one thing to the next to get things done in the least possible time.  By not being present I miss much of the journey.

Lesson 2:  Be present!  I don’t have to be finished with a task before I have even started.  I need to enjoy the journey.

Self-care takes time is the third thing I learnt.  It can’t be hurried.  Every day I had to clean, wrap and care for my toe.  It required patience and I knew that it would take weeks for it to heal and I wanted to ensure that it healed with absolutely no complications. I was very aware of the risk of infection so I made my own saline solution and cared for it with great tenderness.

Lesson 3:  Be gentle!  Berating myself would not serve my healing process, I had to be gentle with myself giving my body all the time it needed to heal.

The fourth understanding was that I do everything with a sense of urgency as if my life depended on it.  My shoulders are tense; I hold my breath and my energy doesn't flow.  I waste a lot of energy.

Lesson 4: Relax!  Go with the flow and focus my energy in such a way that none of it is wasted.

Finally I learnt that to have true self-care you have to listen to your body.  I know we all say it but do we really?  I know I didn't.  I am very aware of every thought now.  I listen intently and I am starting to distinguish between the messages.  Am I hungry, thirsty, tired, in pain or stressed?

Lesson 5: Listen!  In order to have self-care you have to listen to your body.

And the bonus – I am a WORKAHOLIC!  As I cared for my toe and started to listen to my body I started to hear the nonsense my brain spews out.  I now notice how when I want to care for myself my brain tells me it is a waste of time. 

Making myself something to eat will take me away from my work and is therefore a waste time, is but one of the lies I tell myself.  It is clear that I don’t value my health if making myself something to eat is such a low priority.  I am making a concerted effort to change this thought process.  Awareness is half the battle, so now when I hear it I question my motives.  Is it really a waste of time? The answer always is; “NO IT ISN'T!”  

I am working with the root cause of this ridiculous idea.  I believe it comes from my years as a consultant where I preferred to work through lunch because I wanted to get done, get as many hours as possible and go home.  I remember getting upset with people when they wanted to take lunch – they were wasting my time… Can you believe it?  I never said anything to them though, I just felt frustrated.  Often I would not eat the whole day until I got home basically living on one cup of tea. 

Lesson 6:  Dream!  It is not all about getting things done.  Take time to eat healthy and well.  Get enough sleep.  

This is a work in progress… some days I win and some battles I lose but I am using all the tools in my kit to shift this and I will not give up!

In Beauty,


Wednesday, 2 September 2015

5 Behaviours That Will Destroy Your Dreams…. EVERYTIME!

Everyone has dreams and it is of no consequence how big those dreams are or how small.  How you approach your dreams either makes them become reality or remain a daydream.  There has to be steps taken for a dream to become reality.  Just waiting for the Universe to bless you will never work, let’s face it – even if you dream of winning the lottery – you still have to buy that ticket!  Of course providence and being in the right place at the right time also comes into play but usually it also means that some type of action was taken to place you in that space. 

Often we will put all our effort into something only for it to not work out.  This happens frequently, however it regularly turns out that something better is just around the corner out of sight.  When this happens you will usually hear “Wow that worked out for the best.”  

The five behaviours I am going to discuss are the ones we use consciously or subconsciously to block our dreams. 

1.  Not Taking Responsibility:
Stop blaming other people for your shit!  Your parents, siblings, husband, girlfriend, boss or co-workers are not responsible for your choices.  We all have histories and we have all made mistakes – so own yours.  You don’t have to take the blame for other peoples choices only your own.  Sometimes we react to circumstances and people in such a way that we sabotage ourselves, a “cut your nose to spite your face” scenario.  Inevitably we have some hand in the circumstances so we have to take a good hard look at our role and take responsibility without judgement of ourselves or others.  You will find that all the drama will evaporate when you deal with the facts leaving you open to heal your wounds.

2.  Not Taking Action:
Procrastination and laziness are dream serial killers.  Talking up a storm about how you are going to make something happen is never going to bring it to fruition, you have to take action!  An example might be that you want to eat better, so you go to the store and buy healthy choices and look for healthy recipes only to flop down on the couch and get take out.  The food rots away in the fridge to be thrown into the garbage.  Of course we have excuses – I was too tired, I had a tough day at work, the kids drove me mad – but none of these are really valid if we value ourselves and our dreams.  Stop allowing excuses and justifications to ruin your dreams, make a commitment to yourself and your dream and take action!

3.  Break From Reality:
Living in the past or in the future will kill your dreams every time.  When we dwell on the past our story is ever present.  Stories stir up emotion and confuse the brain.  We start to project the same outcome as we have had in the past and it forces us to hold onto patterns.  Living in the future is just as destructive it makes us believe that if circumstances would somehow change then we will be happy.  You can however be happy now just by seeing reality for what it is and being grateful for what you have.  Worry has never solved a single problem, only action does and if there is nothing that can be done then acceptance of your reality is all there is.  Upon acceptance you will feel a weight lift off your shoulders, your emotions will calm down and your brain will clear opening the door to a new understanding of the problem and a new path to take.

4.  Having No Integrity:
What does integrity mean?  It means to have a quality of being honest and having strong moral principles.  It is a state of being whole and undivided.  Lies will stop dreams in their tracks.  The worst kind is the lies you tell yourself.  All the justifications that we have when we don’t act from a place of integrity cause negative energy around us, within ourselves and with others.  When your word can’t be trusted energy can’t move.  What we think and say is the driving force behind the energy we send out into the universe.  Lies cause chaos!   When we stop lying to ourselves and/or others, energy starts to flow and the universe starts to move in your favour.

5.  Self-Importance / Self-Pity:
Two sides of the same coin.  You can’t have self-pity without self-importance.  This is a difficult concept for most – I know I struggled with it for a while.   Self-importance makes us believe that rules don’t apply to us and that we are entitled.   It is that entitlement that blocks dreams because it makes us believe that we don’t have to put any effort in.  Think about what we call the “Entitled Generation” – they are so used to just getting what they want, often without deserving it that it becomes their nature.  If this behaviour is not rectified it can shift into narcissism and in extreme cases become a disorder.  To clarify I am not referring to self-esteem or self-worth – these two traits are essential to make dreams come true.

Self-pity on the other hand allows you to wallow in your misery.  It is a way to indulge in our inability to calm our emotions and break with our past.  It blocks our healing process and keeps us caught in all the situations where we believe we were the victim.  We remain victims of our past and our actions and attract negative energy and stagnation.   Often we find ourselves surrounded by negative people as a result.  When we believe that everything and everyone is against us we will not act because we are fear driven.  Dreams are not born from fear but from courage; courage to heal, to step into the unknown and to take up the challenge and move forward. 

How do you block your dreams?  Which of these behaviours do you practice, all or just some?  Do you fluctuate between self-pity and self-importance?  I believe these to be interesting questions.  If we can be truthful with ourselves we can get a glimpse of where we sabotage our dreams and take steps to rectify our thoughts and actions.  It is hard work but so worth it!

In Beauty


Saturday, 1 August 2015

Broken Relationships...

Broken relationships - we all have our fair share.  The profoundly emotional Youtube video of Artist Marina Abramovic and Ulay seeing each other for the first time in years had me thinking about my own relationships that broke along the twists and turns of this journey I call my life.  With most I am glad to say I have been able to maintain a friendship but in some cases it could never make sense.  Some I got over quickly while others took time to heal.  

So many of my clients keep getting drawn back into the past and are unable to heal the wounded spirit.   Let’s face it, ending a relationship is one of the most uncomfortable things we need to do in our lives, and we have all had to do so at some time.  How we negotiate our discomfort will inevitably plot the course for both our and the other persons healing.  This led to me considering the reasons we hang on to the memories of these broken relationships and here are but a few. 

There isn't closure.
Many people are not capable of ending a relationship neutrally. We don’t want to deal with the other person’s anger and pain so we often take the easy way out.   In this day and age it is common for someone to end a relationship via text or e-mail.  They may think they are “sparing” the other person but actually they are really only protecting themselves.  When a relationship has fallen apart and we are unable to find closure in what has happened it will often stay with us.  We will dwell on the things we should have said or the things that we need to say and are unable to say.  This is especially true if you are “ghosting” the other person by not responding to their request to formally put the relationship out of its misery.

It is sudden.
Most of us know when a relationship is on a slippery slope to nowhere, even if we don’t want to believe it to be true.  We all know of that one person that was blindsided.  Where the other person walks in one day and says “It’s over” packs their bags and leaves.  Many times it is a marriage of many years and the person left behind feels their whole life spinning out of control.  Sudden death has the same impact but the healing steps are clear because there is nothing that can be done about it.

There is bitterness.
If the split was not amicable there is often a lot of bitterness and anger on both sides of the relationship.  Where children are involved they tend to be the only ones that suffer as their parents fight.  The relationship is long over and everyone involved would be better off to just let it go and move on.  However getting rid of that anger and hate locks you into your story and past.  Which in turn is then played out in any future relationship until you say “That’s enough; my story no longer defines me!”

Yet this video makes me wonder how it would be to have one minute of deep spiritual and emotional re-connection as these two people did.  Where for one moment we can see each other as we first did the day we fell in love.  I speculate whether it would open up old wounds or if it would bring true healing.


Our ONLY purpose for choosing to become physical beings is to LOVE.  That is the greatest challenge of all for in order to do so we have to be willing to be vulnerable and live with an open heart that can be broken.  It means we can’t put up walls and lock people out.  To love others as we love ourselves even our enemies.  How can we accomplish this enormous task?   By being present today with gratitude for all that we have, every experience and the beauty of our Souls…

Thursday, 9 July 2015

Change...

Change is something we all fear yet it is all around us every day.  We only have to look to nature to see that it is constant.  The seasons go about their business quietly and calmly. 

Observe a tree for one year… Every cycle it gives up everything it has and goes inside itself.  It appears to be dead during the cold months of winter, there are no stirrings of life.   Then spring hits and the sap begins to flow unseen by the naked eye however if you lay your hand on the tree you can sense a quickening.  Before you know it the green buds appear and as if overnight the tree is in full bloom with flowers and leaves.  Then the summer stage with the fruit of its growth and labour with the final stage the slow decay as it once again goes within.


Our lives mirror this cycle.  There are times when we are at the top of the world and others when we feel as if the Universe has turned against us.  The interesting thing is that this is a cycle but it may not be recognizable.  With awareness of the twenty seven year Karmic wheel you will see how your life organically changes as you move through this wheel.



What is important here is to realize how you engaged in your life in each of these areas.  As an example if you didn’t heal unresolved issues in the completion of your fist Karmic walk at age 27 then you could have dragged that with you into the next cycle.  Or if between the ages of 15-18 you became unprincipled and ungoverned you could have built up a lot of patterns that require healing and so forth.  When studying this wheel you slowly start to realize where you might have created maladaptive patterns in order to deal with the traumas of your life.

If I pay attention to where I am right now, in my 3rd Karmic cycle I am once again calibrating my Life Force.   I made the tough decisions in my final year, healed what I believed needed to be healed and now it is time to regroup.  However I am regrouping with a purpose and refuse to fall into self-pity because things have not gone my way, also staying clear of self-importance by not blaming anyone else and taking responsibility for my own choices. 

Sure change is tough but it happens every day, either in small measure or overwhelming.  We can’t fight it and sometimes the harder we hang on, the more misery we visit upon ourselves.  The best we can do is negotiate change with a positive attitude, healing and hope…

Love & Light

Monday, 1 June 2015

What is Personal Power?

Many people speak of personal power but what is it exactly?  How do you unlock it?  These questions are asked countless times and it seems no-one and everyone has the answer.  Personal power is having the courage to actually DO what is necessary.  Most people pay lip service to their lives in general.  How many promises that you have made to yourself have you actually kept?  How many times have you let yourself down with no follow through?  I know I have more times than I care to count.

Yes I know we all have our personal history, our stories that keep us stuck in the same pattern.  Do you make excuses?  Is there always a story that justifies your lack of action?  In some cases we even go as far as placing the blame on others because taking a step towards personal power will affect them.  We do all of this to avoid taking responsibility for our lives.

One of the things that strike me about personal power is that it is not as elusive as we would like to think.  It is right there all the time, and when we step into it the outcome that we feared the most inevitably doesn't happen.  Why is that?  Because we project a future based on the imagined fear before we take action.  Once you take action the circumstances of the situation change and all projections are transformed.  Interesting…  

The biggest block against personal power is personal history.   This could be every time you were hurt, “taught” a lesson, guilt ridden, abandoned, shamed or blamed but it really boils down to one thing and one thing only… innocence lost.  You can see how these feelings can leave you bitter, vengeful or obstinate.  What can grow in soil that has been tilled with these feelings?  Personal history gives your projections power and suppresses your personal power.  It stops your ability to dream, take chances, open your heart and engage in your life.

I know that some will say that our experiences are what shape us, but they should not dictate what we do from this time forward.  If we can use these experiences as guides to avoid further hurt and loss of innocence I am all for it but if they are kept alive solely for the reason of blocking our path and putting up a wall then they serve no purpose. 

Here is a little exercise.  Think of a time when you actually stepped into your power and dealt with a difficult situation.  How did it make you feel?  Did it really turn out as bad as you had thought? What did you gain?  Now imagine that you did nothing…. Where would you be now?

I remember a particular ceremony during my warrior training that pushed so hard against my fear I nearly gave up.  I was to find a place out in nature away from everyone, dig a hole, cover it with a tarp and sleep in my “grave” overnight.  When I first heard about this ceremony I was excited and eager but as the time to do it drew closer I felt such a resistance that it was palpable.  I made up excuse after excuse, I couldn't find a place, what about bears, spiders and snakes (none of which I am afraid of with the exception of bears) etc. etc..  I walked for six hours trying to find a spot only to return and angrily confront my teacher saying that I am not doing the ceremony.  She just nodded, told me to work with the fear and walked away.  I became infuriated, how could she have such disregard for my safety.  However when I sat down with that fear I realized that being with myself with no distractions and only the work that had to be done, which was to look at my life, what I was, what I think of myself and what others may think of me should I die today, scared the crap out of me.  Being that honest with me was beyond anything I had done before.  Then it hit me, it isn't that I couldn't confront me,  I couldn't confront  my personal history, there was so much guilt, hurt and blame.  So I stepped into my power, dug my hole, grabbed a blanket, warrior journal, pen and flashlight and pulled that tarp across my grave.  I laughed at myself thinking “you made your grave now lie in it” and I started with the cleanup.  That was the first (but not the last) time I truly let go of some of my personal history.  Had I not completed this ceremony I would not be where I am today I would still be stuck with the fear of facing myself and the unknown. 

For most people this may sound quite drastic.  Of course you don’t need to do anything this extreme but do take steps towards erasing your personal history and letting it go.  Find a practitioner that can guide you gently to facing your personal history so that you can be free.

So what does it take to step into your power?  Erase your personal history and let it go.  Find the courage to do what’s necessary.  Once done you can be the sorcerer of your life, the one that weaves magic and new experiences powerful enough to propel you forward towards the life you want and need. 

Love & Light




Thursday, 14 May 2015

A Guide to finding your Soul's Age....

I have been noticing that the people who have embraced a spiritual lifestyle seem to be in competition about how “Old” their souls are.  Many of my clients ask me if I know the age of their Soul, so I thought it would be interesting to research and do a “Soul Age for Dummy’s” and believe me I feel like a dummy!  What I do know is that I know nothing...  

Many hours of research later I found that I have only scratched the very surface of this topic.  There is so much to learn and so much more involved than the age of your Soul.  Long periods of inner work has brought me to the conclusion that I am probably somewhere in on the second level of the Mature Soul stage.  It is complicated and difficult to understand the “levels” and “stages” within the levels, it boggles the mind actually ~ so that is why I asked my Soul. 

Here is my interpretation of the information I have gathered.  Have some fun with it to determine where you think you are. Keep in mind that it isn't really important, what is important is that you are doing the work you have come to do.

One of the first things to know is that each age has seven stages so you can be in one age for a very long time, centuries and countless lifetimes.  The Soul ages for the world’s population are bell shaped statistically.  If it were depicted on a graph it would look like this:


Infant Soul: These are the Souls that are just starting out on their journey.  Statistically there don’t seem to be many of these in our societies.  However one of the keys to these souls is that they are raw and primitive.  They don’t have the know-how to act within social norms and structures.  The things they do make no sense to us.  An example of an Infant soul may be a serial killer or a mother that murders her children.  They seem to lack any sense of the depth of what they have done and are completely without remorse. Often they are disconnected from society, can’t find their place in this world and don’t want to be here.

Baby Soul: These Souls are all about discipline and structure.  Now that they have made it through the seven stages of the Infant soul they are in need of serious structure.  From everything I have read religious fanatics are here, from the Taliban to the Deep South.  They crave a strong sense of belonging and the rules are fiercely obeyed and anyone who is not in agreement is just wrong and shunned.  They prefer to live in close-knit communities with like people.  Order is the word of the day.  Hitler is an example of a Baby soul running rampant and unchecked.

Young Soul: These Souls are ambitious, materialistic and highly driven.  I think these souls show up in our world all the time (and according to the graph above).  Everybody wants to be a hero!  Young souls are busy developing their own perspective and agenda, finding their own talents and their own way of seeing things and doing things.  It is “me against the world… and it is all about me”. These souls are competitive with themselves and others – they have a strong need to win.  Some well-known Young souls may be – Bill Clinton, John F. Kennedy Elvis Presley.

Mature Soul: These Souls are about interconnections.  It is no longer only about what is going on out there in the world but also about what is going on “in here”.  At this stage souls are starting to develop a sense of the bigger picture they want to know what makes them tick.  It is important for them to see other perspectives and allow others the freedom that they themselves seek.  All black or white views start to shift and everything seems to be grey as there is a realization that there are perspectives upon perspectives.  The souls start to develop empathy of others and their plight.  Inner conflict is very common.  Where young souls tend to blame everyone else mature souls blame themselves first.  Tony Blair, Meryl Streep, Shakespeare and Van Gogh are examples of mature souls.

Old Soul: The final leg of the journey…  Old souls have a well-developed sense of interdependence and independence possibly from a very young age.  The best way to recognize them is their inner calm and their deliberate and slower communication.  They know why they are here and what they are doing.  There isn't a big attachment to materialism however they are still connected with this world and live life fully and engaged.  Some are here to teach.  There are people who believe they are old souls purely because they are not materialistic but my understanding is that, that is not how it works.  If you have issues with being physical then there is still some way to go.  Examples are, Alice Walker, The Dalai Lama and Morgan Freeman some suggest Clint Eastwood.

All this research brought me to the question – WHY?  Why do we choose to re-incarnate?  One of the best answers I found was:

“The goal of evolution is not to escape from the wretched physical plane, despite what many teach. The end of reincarnation is not some sort of reward for good behaviour. Human existence is not a prison, or a wheel of torment, from which only the most worthy gain liberation.

We incarnate because we want to and we choose to. We keep doing it precisely because we want to come to terms with it. We know that in each life we will probably spend several decades not remembering who we are, not remembering our eternal Home, buying into the illusion of separation, experiencing fear. This is the very stuff which inspires us to become more conscious.

Completion occurs when it matters not whether you are incarnate or discarnate: you see through the illusion and you always feel at Home”.

Once the soul has completed the final stage it no longer has a need to return.  It can become one with the source and unify with soul mates that are also complete or become spirit guides.  There are however exceptions.  Gandhi returned after completion to spark a cultural revolution.  Even rarer is the return of Souls such as Jesus and Buddha who returned to become the physical embodiment of divine love, pure consciousness and ultimate truth, a piece of the Tao in human form.   

References:
The Michael Teachings
The Michael Handbook
http://personalityspirituality.net/articles/the-michael-teachings/reincarnation-the-35-steps/stage-5-the-old-soul/





Saturday, 4 April 2015

I imagine that Women and Men are equal...

What do you think are men and women equal? I believe we have come a long way but we are not equal.  If we were there would be no need for this question would there?  Something brought this thought to the forefront for me this week. I was working on-site in North Carolina having a friendly conversation about stress with the site project manager when he says "Women just are not suited for certain jobs, they just can't do it".  

I confess I was taken aback, so much so that I was rendered speechless for a minute or two. After all this is 2015, such sentiments should be long gone.  More frightening was the fact that this wasn’t some old codger hanging onto the power of his youth… no this was a young man, early forties for sure and here he was saying something so offensive.

“Do you mean heavy lifting?” I asked trying to ascertain if he was referring to brute strength because obviously women just by the structure of their bodies may not be best suited to that skill. “No, they just can’t cope with anything… stress, you name it.”

A slew of things ran through my mind to say, but I decided not to because it would have been a waste of breath.  Men like this can’t be reasoned or argued with, they need time to evolve. To make things worse this guy is a South African and I was immediately filled with a sense of shame. 

It was my first time working with this team and customer. During the week things fell into place.  I realized he was just a scared boy way out of his league unable to communicate clearly with the customer or the team. Treating women and less aggressive men as inferior made him feel powerful until he was faced with what he considered a superior male; then he could hardly string a sentence together. I found myself saving him on more than one occasion.  

Should I have?  Yes… as a compassionate person I believe it was my duty. Perhaps with my help he can begin to see that we are all equal….


Love & Light


Thursday, 5 March 2015

Staying Connected...

I had a wonderful time in Hawaii.  As predicted I was feeling healed by the time I left.  When I reflect back on the experience I remember that the day I arrived I was talking fast and completely wrapped up in my story of work and all the balls I am juggling every day.  One of the Sisters looked at me and said “BREATHE”.  I heard her but I stopped only for a split second to take a breath and continue my story of how tough things have been.  It was as if words were tumbling from my mouth without any control and my mind was racing a mile a minute.

After the first night I was feeling a little better.  My energy settled down and I started to speak slower with more thought.  Slowly I started to unwind and let go of all those things that fill my mind with confusion and doubt.  As the week progressed things became clearer and I was able to feel what was actually going on in my life rather than my perception of it.  I learned that I still have an issue with attachment and justification, something that I am now actively addressing…daily.  Any of my clients reading this will have a small smile right now because they know how much effort it takes to be aware and take action every time you are triggered and not to act out in your pattern.  My healing like everyone else’s is a journey.  

I digress, but the end of the week I was calm, grounded, centered and feeling strong, standing in my power soaking up the sun and heat, eating well and sleeping even better.  Then the week was over and I was on my way home….

I was so determined to hang onto this wonderful feeling of being grounded and balanced that I promised myself that I would put forward a strong intent to hold it but life happens.  Our flight was delayed by two and a half hours, still I was good…” it is what it is” I said to myself and held my ground.  For a week and two days I held it, nothing shook my ability to stay centered not even the unrelenting cold that never seemed to lift.  Then real challenges were thrown at me and my center shifted.  Lucky for me I was able to bring it back, so all is not lost and I am speaking clearly with the people who are pushing my buttons. 

It did make me question the sense of sanctuary a spiritual retreat gives you.  It is easy to be one with yourself and others when you are secluded and not really engaged in the day to day realism of your life.  By definition isn't that exactly what retreat means, to withdraw or hideaway?  It takes a lot more will to stay engaged and balanced when you are dealing with everyday chaos and the people who drive you crazy.  I won't  give up, I'll keep at it!


Don’t get me wrong, I am very grateful for the opportunity to go on the retreat, without it I think I would be a bumbling idiot or a raging maniac by the time spring arrives.  The trick is going to be in staying in a state of grace….

Love & Light

Tuesday, 3 February 2015

Its A Mad World....

For the first time in as long as I have been doing this I am speechless!  The news of the sadistic murder of the Jordanian pilot and the beheading of innocent people by ISIS is sickening me.  The slaughter of villages in Nigeria... Deaths in France, I could go on and on.  I usually don't talk about these things but it is becoming impossible to ignore.  This darkness has to be fought with everything we have. 

I was watching the news on the 70th anniversary of the liberation of Auschwitz and there was an old Jewish man being interviewed.  He was fifteen when liberation came and the only reason he was still alive was because his father spoke to one of the guards and said he was seventeen and could work. He was in the queue being led to the gas-chamber but for some reason the guard had compassion and took him from the line and gave him to his father.  His mother and sister had already been murdered. This eighty five year old man (I wish I could remember his name) spoke of what is happening in the world right now and the correlation he drew was eye-opening.  I had never thought of it quite that way. He spoke of how the youth are being seduced by the madness - just like the Hitler Youth.  He spoke about the murder of innocent Jews in France, and that this is how it starts, but he did mention that the solidarity expressed was a step in the right direction.  

What can we do you ask? Most of us are not part of the military, our hands seem tied but we can do something.  This man dedicated his life to humanitarianism.  He did everything in his power to make the world a better place. We can force the darkness back by doing everything we can to support life.

It made me reflect on some of the things we can do.  

  • Light your light and keep it burning!
  • Realize that everything is connected
  • Care for Mother Earth
  • Random acts of kindness
  • Generosity
  • Pay it forward
  • Compassion
  • Fight injustice wherever you find it
  • Step up in the defense of others 
  • Heal yourself and help others do the same
  • Last but not least LOVE
I know it may seem meaningless in the face of this adversity, but know that every act that supports life sends ripples out into the Universe so I call on all Light-workers... lead the way!

Love & Light


"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing". Edmund Burke

Tuesday, 6 January 2015

Enter the Year of the Goat

Starting around February 4th and coming into full swing on February 19, 2015 the Year of the Goat AKA Sheep will come into play.  This will herald a gentler energy of communication and understanding. 

I don’t think I spoke to anyone in 2014 that said that it was a calm year.  Most commented that the year was running away with them and that they were hardly holding on.  The Year of the Horse turned out to be exactly as predicted… unpredictable in nature and volatile with many twists and turns.  I know this was certainly the case for me.

I welcome a gentler year.  2015 will not be without its challenges I am sure but by all accounts there is going to be a dramatic shift in energy.  People all over the world are going to push back against the dark energies that have been trying to take hold of the world.  It is predicted that much of the political turmoil will quiet and in some cases even cease. 

Personal relationships will follow the same curve.  It will be a time for healing and extending the olive branch.  As I research 2015, healing seems to be a common thread. 

2015 will be a time for me to recover from the chaos of 2013 and the speed of 2014.  Both these years flew by for me however 2014 was a wild ride.  I did succeed in many cases and accomplished much of what I needed to but a breakneck speed! 


Prioritizing will be important this year.  Now is a time to create a solid foundation for the future.  Heal old wounds and allow the gentle Sheep to guide you to greener pastures…

Love & Light